Friday, April 4, 2014

The day everything changes

Cai was crying and crying. I knew he was just overtired and was so tempted to just put him up in our room and leave him alone. The thought crossed my mind so so many times during the 2 hours of hysterical crying.

Finally my husband walked through the door and I practically threw my crying baby into his arms saying here you take him. He was so sweet and took Cai started to change his diaper to see if that was what was wrong. Then Cai started projectile vomiting all the food from lunch. In seconds he was covered in hives. Mac ran to get the Benedryl. Seconds later he started wheezing. It was moving so fast I told Mac to get the epipen as I held Cai. He couldn't find it in my garbage dump of a purse so we handed Cai off again. Finally I found the epipen. I gave it to him and everything went back to normal. The hives disappeared, his breathing was fine and he stopped vomiting.

While we had been doing this my husband had somehow managed to call 911 and the ambulance arrived. They saw a 11 month old baby who looked healthy and alert. One man who had a shirt on designating him as a chief asked an EMT if he was sure he could handle this. The EMT said of course. The chief looked worried. As they were doing Cai's stats I decided to run back in for my purse for some reason thinking it would be good if I have his epipen with me. That must have been one or both of our guardian angels whispering in my ear.

While on the ambulance Cai seemed fine. Until suddenly, his O2 sat dropped to 70 %, then within the space of seconds he started projectile vomiting,  was covered in a rash and stopped breathing. The EMT just stared at me frozen. I looked at him waiting for him to act. I said where is your epi. He said we don't have any. That was the moment my heart sank. There was no hope there in that ambulance. Cai started to lose consciousness. The EMT told the driver what was happening and called the hospital. He sounded excited, not terrified, not like this was someone's real baby, like it was some stupid game he was playing to get an adrenaline rush. I got the epi out of my purse and gave it to my son. Again within seconds he was fine. The head to toe rash was gone, he started to breathe, and he was pissed that his leg hurt.

I will be forever thankful that I had those epipens. That I didn't trust that everything would be ok because the ambulance was there. And that our angels were watching over us so closely that night.

My mind was full of what ifs. What if I had never gotten those epipens? What if I had believed the allergist who told me that my son had no allergies, in spite of the history I reported to him. What if my baby had never learned to walk because the county we lived in did not allow EMTs access to epinephrine? Because no EMT  only Medics were technically allowed to transport  anyone suffering from an anaphylactic reaction. And so I thank God everyday for the gift we were given.

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